A letter to Jon - from HWY 417

So what is more lame…getting backended on the 417 in the middle of rush hour or waiting on the 417 for the cops to show up? Yes – you got it. They are equal in their lameness. It is seriously not my day. I need a drink.

So hows my guy…wish I could call you right now, but no cell to speak of. And therefore the highway hanging out is all I got here and I can use my word and write you a little letter and feel a bit better and a bit more productive then doing absolutely nothing but staring and traffic passing us. I even had a guy yet out “Idiot” to me. Great. Thanks buddy, yah, its all my fault isn’t it? I am the one in front. I automatically win. The guy behind me loses; it isn’t rocket science who is in fault here.

Anyway, whatever, its 30 degrees, sunny…who wouldn’t want to be in hot traffic smelling exhaugst and wanting water. Maybe this is what I get for being so cute. Ha ha ha. I mean though in the big sheme of things I got it so good, so this is a like a little “dent” (pardon the pun) to make it even in the long run. I don’t know about that, but lets go with it.

The bumper on the Element looks like ass – sorta evens out the dings in the sides I guess. The car makes noises like its from 1995, and the clutch still squeeks. Matt says that sometimes it goes away – maybe it’s the way I drive it, that is what my Dad might say. SO the funny thing is that the windshield whiper fluid light is on, and the check maintenance light. Also with my experience with my Dad’s car last week – the wind shield washer was out there as well. Funny yet retarded. But hey, that sums up my family some times.

Oh – I see cops in the distance – hope they are mine.

By the way - the guy who rear ended me was nice enough to take a picture with his iphone and send it to me via email so that I have memories for ever. awesome.

Work is Crazy

Shoot - I hardly have time for this. And yet here is is 8pm and I am still at work - crazy right? Well, I did just get back to work after a work out and dinner :)

But it is true my work is nuts right now. If I do not have this solution design that I am heading across the country to demo, right, I think I might burst into tears right in front of the client, which would be pretty silly and highly embarressing.

HOWEVER, I have been put on the spot in phone conferences suggesting that this onsite visit will determine the project success up to this point. Yikes.

Well, that being said, back to work!!!

Thankfully I have a wedding to get drunk at, with 5 of my closest girlfriends in the world, and they will make me laugh and forget the stressses that await the next week.

Who are we kidding? What stresses? It's going to be fine. I am Pro. My solution design is tight.
A - 1.

ps Keep your fingers crossed for me.

xoxoxoxoxo
sacha

Ode to Sombrio

I went surfing on Thursday after work and I think tomorrow (holiday Monday) might be worth a trip up for a  sunset surf. I have been realizing lately what a stress reducer my time in the water is - specifically at Sombrio beach. In the water I do not really think about anything except the waves, or the water, or the birds, or the whales (that I may or may not see). I guess I might think about my technique and my wave count and who is around me in the water, but not tons. And I do not want to talk too much and usually, the others surfers do not either. A nod, a smile, a little, hey hows it going, usually does it.

And then when I get out and I reflect about my time in the water from the beach, looking back at the breaking waves that I was just in, I think how clear my head is. How every worry that was on my mind earlier had just melted away. That it is all OK. Walking up the trail back to the parking lot, gazing up at some of the oldest protected trees on the island I feel so light, so happy. I feel in touch with nature, in touch with myself that I almost I feel giddy. I feel reflective and young. I feel like I could do anything, handle any situation. To be honest, retrospecitively, it is almost like I find life's meaning there. That somewhere in my subconcious I have discovered the secret to life, my life anyway. And I am in a state of devine peace. It sounds "too much" maybe, but it is a true feeling that I have and I want to make myself accountable for it. To remember it and treasure it. I do have a strong belief and have for along time that nature is my god. One day I will write on that one and try to articulate what that means.

I know now for sure where I will go at any time in my life where I feel like I "cannot take it anymore". It's funny cause I have been surfing at Sombrio for 8 years now, and the feeling of comfort and love and peace gets stronger and stronger every time I am there. It is way to beautiful, the trees are way too big. You feel like a small thing in this world and maybe that is why your worries vanish into thin air, because in the big picture up there, they do not mean anything. I can understand why people have just wanted to live there and have lived there. I think it is a special place, with special powers.

I think I am very lucky that I have found a place that I can escape the city to go to; arrive in less than two hours and know without a doubt I will leave with a complete sense of utter healing.

Togetherness apart.

My blog application was down the last couple times I tried to post ...

This post is about a togetherness, even when you are far apart. Yes, it is about Jon and I and how life is without him. I miss him. I do. I mean it is hard to complain too, because for him, it is the last thing he needs to hear. It's his job, his means to sustain himself, our selves and to complain to him does not do anything but make him feel badly. What is the point?

Secondly - to let it get to me is futile. It does not help, it hinders. What do you do when you feel lonely and sad? Nothing productive let me tell you :) So do you ignore it, do you pretend happiness?Yes, that technique does work to an extent, keep busy, have plans, make plans, fill your week with a mix of visiting and quiet evenings. Try your hardest to eat right - make meals even though it is just for one.

The reality of the situation is that in the big picture life is perfect and in the months that Jon is away I have to remember how independent I am. How much I love to spend time with myself and how to take advantage of the time alone, instead of feeling lonely.

Cleanse update

So I went for a 24 hour juice cleanse. Didn't love feeling hungry so I ate peanuts to suffice. Low energy the next day...not really my thing. done and done.

Back to just eating clean and prospering.

yah!

oh Victoria - when are you planning to show off some of your amazing spring weather?!?!

Another busy day at work - 2 workshops - 1 demo, goodtimes.

Cleanse Me.

This Easter weekend coming up I am planning on a 4 day juice cleanse. This is to compliment my current cleanse or diet (however you want to call it), which goes a little somethink like this: no flour, no sugar, no booze, no fun, ha ha ha. This juice cleanse will end Monday at 6pm for an Easter dinner, which will be nice treat. It starts Friday morning with a 9am workout with my trainer and then a facial at my favorite spa (Silk Road).

I feel like my attempts to be as healthy as I can are really paying off. I feel good, I feel strong and I have more energy than I have had in a while. I am a bit of a health nut anyway, so this transition is not challenging for me, it feels more like a natural progression towards how I want to eat for the rest of my life. I mean, realistically it may not be super feasible to have this time and money in other periods in my life, but I hope that I can take a lot what I learn from this 6 week trial  and incorporate into my every day and least as much as I can.

I certainly do not feel like I am starving myself. In fact it’s somewhat of the opposite. I had a big smoothie this morning with a full banana, ½ cup of blueberries, 1.5 scoops of hemp hearts and a cup of almond milk. I just got back from lunch where I had a raw “burger”, which is sweet hearty heaven. Dehydrated type of bun and a patty made out of mushrooms and seeds and goodness. With a sundried tomato “ketchup” and a tahini tasting “mayo”, sunflower seed spouts, lettuce and tomato. I picked up some yam crackers (dehydrated) for my organic black bean soup and avocado I am having for dinner. I also had a mango ball…which is a treat type raw dessert.   I am actually quite full.

Snacks are endless on this cleanse. I eat prunes, raw nuts, veggie pate and wheat-free/gluten-free organic crackers. I buy young coconuts and cut of the heads and drink the water and eat the inside young coconut meat…sounds barbaric but it is sweet sweet stuff. I even made a raw phai thai on Sunday for the hockey game that Jon and Cyn raved about. This recipe came from my friend Susan Prior who has a great raw food recipe book that I highly recommend for anyone interested in cooking raw foods. http://alive-n-well.net/ 

Anyway, just thought I would share a little something, it’s been a while. Plan to write a bit while on my cleanse. Perhaps I will add a journal entry talking to something abstract and not self absorbing J .

Thanks for the distraction, blog

I am thinking of a theme to go with for a note on my blog and I am so full of work thoughts, this morning's thoughts and planning this evening's thoughts, I can barely think or write about anything else. I need some tea and then I will attempt my large list of items that I have to start/complete work on. I think the fact that the list is so enormous makes me less motivated, shorten the list Sacha ------ FOCUS!

Well, at least there is a hockey game to look forward to tonight. I am Canuck crazy and about to get HD for sports channels – super cool! And then wedding invites – the bain of my existence right now. I have to get them out the door – holy smokes! When I am done and they are received by the lucky 14, I will post a couple of pictures of them and talk about them a little, because they are really special to me.

Ok that’s it – thanks for the distraction, blog – but I must buckle down and get this work done.